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Death in the family

2003-11-10 @ 8:57 p.m.

Mom just called this evening about an hour ago to tell me that my cousin in the Philippines passed away from a heart attack in his sleep. He's 25 years old. I've had an uncle who is my mother's brother and her best friend, he passed away the same way and he was 21 at the time. So, I never got to meet him, I just have pictures.

Obviously, this is something that runs in the family, something that I will need to do some research on. This gives me more motivation to quit my smoking.

For us here in the US, he passed away this morning, for the Philippines, it was late Saturday early Sunday morning. I'm from a family that has many many beliefs, and strangest things always happens before someone passes away in our family, yet we never think about it until the death happens. I was sick with my stomach all last week, my mother was sick all week as well. Saturday night when I was bowling, while sitting I would literally be sweating all over my head, my chest and my back for over an hour and nearly passed out, my mother lost complete feeling in her hand reaching for a bowl in the fridge, she said it felt as if someone grabbed her hand and she just lost feeling yet can feel something cold holding her hand. Today, both my mother and I are no longer sick. Mom received the call collect from the Philippines tonight and called me right away.

Like I said earlier, more reason for me to quit smoking. I'm glad that I got to see my cousin when I went back to the Philippines a few years ago, it's hard to believe that he is gone. For some reason, it's hard for me to cry right now. He and I have always been close, we always kept in touch, and always hung out when I was there. He was my best friend whenever I went back home.

And now, he's gone. And I don't understand why...and why I'm having such a hard time to shed my tears but, yet deep down I am crying.


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