2003-06-06 @ 11:41 p.m.
I actually finally got some sleep while I was home visiting. I haven't slept so good in so long. I kept dreaming about Paul and Holleigh, even during my naps-when I had time to take them. Well, when I got back, the very same day, I got an e-mail from Paul. Quite interesting actually, but, we talked online for a while, he says he still loves me, that's a good thing...he knows how much I still love him as well. For now, he doesn't want to get into another relationship with everything that has happened with his mom and all but, wants us to be friends with benefits...which is fine, I think. We actually discussed how we would handle everything with us still loving each other, yet not getting into a relationship...I guess this is a "trial" thing, who knows. Of course, I'm not going to get my hopes up in case things don't work the way we want, I flat out told him, I don't want to be hurt anymore or used, etc. And he understood, and apologized for hurting me. I'm still in the midst of soaking it all in because I'm a bit confused how to handle all of this. So, all I can do is see what happens from here.
Anyway...other than that, not too much going on. But, I do need to get to bed...it's late and I'm dozing as I am typing this...it's a good thing I can type w/out looking....lol.
Well, good night...and I will do my best to continue to post.
Blessed Be!!
~Victorianna~
