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Bitch...Bitch...Bitch...Will it ever stop???

Friday, Jun. 03, 2005 @ 8:43 a.m.

For some reason today I find myself thinking about Paul. I donít know if itís because Holleighís birthday is coming up or what. Her birthday is on June 25th, the same day as Danís. Holleigh will be 8 years old this year, and will be 3 years since I last saw her and there still isnít a day that goes by that I donít think about her. **Sigh** I think this is the only reason why Paul has popped into my mind today. Wondering what he has planned for her for her birthday.

Dan hasnít been feeling too well the last couple of days and neither have I. Not so much ill like the flu or anything, just really horrible stomach pains is all. But, Iím sure it will all pass soon.

Work has been crazy lately. Iím still doing ďclean upĒ work that Nick left undone the last 6 years that he was here before he got fired. Thereís so much and I canít believe how he got away with so muchÖwell, actually I do but we wonít go into detail on here. With my new position I have an office with a window, just a lot of new perks, etc. A lot of people that I worked with that reside on the other side of the office come in to visit me and envy my new position and all that good stuff. I share an office with Deb, one of my good friends here at work and itís nice-SOME daysÖthereís a lot of times that I really miss my privacy and I think itís mainly because Iíve noticed that she has a lot of negativity within her. Granted, weíre all guilty of having negativity in our lives, but with me having depression and fighting it on a daily basis, I always do my best to stay away from so much negativity because I donít need it to bring me down. And itís so difficult each day hearing it on a daily basis.

Debís a great person, donít get me wrong, but there is just so much I can handle of the bitching and moaning that she does on a daily basis, and one of the pet peeves that Iím having is the fact that she jumps to conclusions on situations that Iím trying to fix rather than asking for all the details of the situation. Sheíll jump to conclusions and then start talking to me like I have no brain or something. When this happens I just explain until my face is blue unless she keeps talking to me the same way then I just let her have her say until sheís done and then give her the details AGAIN then she turns around and says ďoh, well shit, I would have done the same thing you did. I didnít realizeĒ and then leaves it at that. Iím thinking, before you waste all your breath bitching and not knowing the details, listen first then youíll understand. But, sheís 10 years older than me and set in her ways, but Iím beginning to understand how her son feels that she starts arguments and she feels that she doesnít. Itís not an easy task.

Iím learning to adjust sharing an office with her and since I come in early in the morning and she doesnít come in until 9:30, I take advantage of the privacy that I have before she is here and when she is out of the office as well as when she is out and about doing things in the office. Because when she is here, itís hard for me to get a lot of stuff done because she is constantly bitching about something, and I keep thinking ďplease let me get my work doneĒ Hence why I end up working 10-12 hour days so that I can get things done around here.

Today is Friday and Iím hoping to get quite a bit done today. Especially before Deb gets in. Usually by the time she gets here Iím already 3-3 Ĺ hours into my day, the other 5 hours or so she makes it difficult for me to accomplish so much. I have to figure out ways to be able to block her out or something in a nice way where I wonít offend or piss anyone and be able to get my work done. Any suggestions would be great! **Sigh**

Have a happy Friday and great weekend all! Blessed Be!!

Much Love~